Last post of the Streak.

I had originally planned to continue this streak till end of the year, breaking my own record on this blog. However, I have decided to take a (hopefully small) break from the streak. I haven't been writing to my liking since past few days. I know it's not easy every day to write fluently, but it shouldn't feel like a chore either. Writing should come from the heart.

Secondly, writing on a daily basis also makes it a chore for your reader too, if they don't really get that much time to read. So, hopefully spacing out the blogs will be better for both me and you. 

I started this streak to prove to myself that I still have it in me to write on a regular basis. I will say that I have been fairly successful in that goal. I completed 3 milestones on each of the 3 blogs in these 30 days. That's been the biggest highlight of this streak, for me.

However, I want to write something meaningful that I myself can enjoy reading sometime in future. I feel some of the past few posts haven't lived up to that mark. 

As I wrote at the start of the month, I want to write fiction. So I will probably try to write a couple of stories in the month of December. No promises, but that's definitely something to try. Most of my stories have been based on a vague idea, on which I have just developed the scene as I kept writing. But this time I will try to build a different approach. Probably bring more than 2-3 characters to develop a little more complex story-line, and write the structure before filling the details. That's already making me uncomfortable, so wish me luck. 

Participating and successfully completely NaNoWriMo is in my bucket list for a very long time. I have even started it a couple of times, but didn't quite complete it. Well, predictably this November also went unsuccessfully. It's been a successful month for me as a blogger but not as a fiction writer. I hope I get to be successful next year. 

As for general blogging that will continue. I have a quite a few topics to write upon but this time I want to take my own time to write, so that real essence of my thoughts can be brought out. 

PS : It would also be great if you tell me directly if you want me to write on a particular topic. 

आज कल चैन नहीं हैं।

काम है, मगर चैन नहीं हैं।  कोई ख़ास कारण नहीं।  मगर नहीं है, तो नहीं है।  ना दो पल बैठ के किसी से बात करने की फुर्सत ,ना कभी रुक कर कहाँ जा रहे हैं  का इल्म।  बस उठो तो ऑफिस जाओ, ऑफिस नहीं तो कोई जिम्मेदारी निभाओ।  फिर किसी को फ़ोन , किसी को मैसेज, कोई ईमेल का जवाब, कोई ब्लॉग लिखना। कोई बिल भरना तो कहीं जाने की टिकट कराना। यही काम करते करते रात हो जाना फिर अगले दिन का सोच के जैसे-तैसे सो जाना। 

कभी कभी कुछ रिश्तेदारी और दोस्ती का फ़र्ज़ निभाने इधर-उधर जाना।  कभी ये कभी वो।  एक काम ख़त्म  हुआ नहीं की दुसरे को ख़त्म  करने की चिंता होने लगती है। फिल्म देखना, घूमना फिरना भी आज कल कार्य भर लगने लगा है, जिसे निभा कर आगे बढ़ा जाए। 

पैसा पहले से ज्यादा है, मगर समय पहले से कम।  दोस्त पहले से ज्यादा हैं, मगर दोस्ती पहले से कम। और ऐसा नहीं है की काम में मैं नहीं लगता। मुझे शिकायत नहीं  किसी काम से। बस सुकून नहीं मिलता तो कोई काम करने में उतना मजा भी नहीं आता। 

काश कुछ ऐसा होता बटन मेरे पास।  उसे दबाता और सब कुछ स्थिर हो जाता।  सब करता मैं मगर अपनी गति से। कुछ चैन से, कुछ आराम से। 

लिखना तो मैं और चाहता हूँ, मगर नींद बहुत है आँखों में। और ना जाने क्यों ये ब्लॉग लिख कर ख़त्म करने की जल्दी।  फिर क्या फायदा ऐसे लिखने का जिसे लिखने पर चैन ना मिले। 

शुभ रात्रि। कल फिर मिलते हैं एक नए ब्लॉग के साथ।  फिलहाल  चैन से सो जाइये। 

11th Floor (Fiction)

Following is a short story I wrote about 5 years ago. This was embedded in my last working day email in my previous organization. I got to read it again today, thanks to a friend. I didn't like it that much at the time I wrote it. But I found it great while rereading it today. So, while I won't be sharing the whole mail, as it was personal and mostly irrelevant to you. But the story is worth sharing. I did a slight one line change at the very end of the story. Enjoy the story and do tell if you like it. I might write another one soon :)





"Are you going to jump?"

"I don't know"

"Standing on the edge of 11th floor balcony and you don't know if you are going to jump?"

"Yeah, Yeah! I don't know. Shut up!".

There was silence in the room.

"Tell me, what do you see Chiraag?"

"Lots of cars running up and down the road".

"And?"

"White headlights on one end and red taillights ​​ on the other side of road. Streaks of white and red painting the black surface. People going home from their offices, back to their loved ones. Everyone in a hurry. It's a mad rush."

"Anything else you see?"

"Yes."

"What?"

"The dark blue sky mixing with the pale yellow setting sun at the horizon. The darkness... engulfing the city slowly... Stars are coming out of their caves."

"Isn't it beautiful?"

"Yes it is"

"Then why do you want to end your life?"

"BECAUSE OF YOU!", Chiraag groans. "You have made my life unlivable"

"But I am your friend."

"No Sweetu you are not!! You are just a stuffed toy who has driven me to insanity."

Chiraag looked on his right. A white teddy with a heart in his hand was lying on a brown colored plastic chair. The light was dim but the teddy looked to be smiling.

"But you always talk to me"

"Yes, I do. You know why?", Chiraag stopped for a while. "Because, I am... Schizophrenic.". He clinched his teeth.  "I didn't believe them earlier. I believed none of them. But now I know, you are not a real person. You are just a stuffed piece of cloth."

"Don't leave me alone Chiraag. Don't go."

"Haha, No, Sweetu. I am done with you. All my friends have left me because of you. I can't waste my life anymore with you".

"Chiraag".

Chiraag looks at Sweetu. The toy was smiling and seemed to be looking at him. Chirag looked back into its bead like eyes.

"Won't you stay Chiraag?"

"NO. NO!"

The toy's faced turned sombre. "THEN DIE!".

All of a sudden, the toy's hands grew and  pulled the rug under Chirag's feet. Chirag slipped down the balcony. From 11th floor...

---

THUDDD!

Chiraag woke up. Blood was gushing down his head. But he was still on 11th floor.

He tried to stand up and searched for a piece of cloth and  pressed his wound with it. He realized he had actually fallen from his bed.

He looked at the wall clock, it was close to 6 in the morning. Sweetu was lying on the chair. Smiling. A stuffed heart in his hand.

Chiraag speed dialed a number on his phone.

"Hello Shraddha".

"Good Morning Chiraag. How are you feeling today?"

"I am... fine Shraddha. Listen..."

"Yeah."

"I want to come and get admitted today."

"What?! Are you sure? Because you have been asking not to...".

"Yeah. I think it's time".

"That's great news Chiraag! I will make all the arrangements inside the hospital soon enough. When are you coming?"

"I am leaving now."

The call was disconnected.

Chiraag stared into the Teddy's bead like eyes again. There was always something engrossing in them. It reminded him of something. Of someone... Who gave him this present.

"No!"

There was a white rope lying under the bed. He pulled it out.

"No!"

Chiraag tied the white rope in Teddy's neck with one end of the rope and took the other in his own hand.

He left the room pulling Sweetu with him behind his back. There were elevators at the corner of the floor. But he skipped them and took stairs instead.

11 flights of stairs. Chiraag was coming down slowly. The white teddy tumbling down behind him.

People were stopping and giving him way. No one was sure what was going on. Why was a teddy tied to a rope from its neck and being pulled?

After about 10 minutes, he was out of the apartments and onto the footpath.

"Bhaiyya".

Chiraag stopped. He had bare​ly​ walked 50 metres from the gate. There was a little girl of about 10 years age, standing beside him. Already started with her daily occupation. Begging.

She raised her right hand. "Something to eat?".

"No, I don't have any money right now".

She looked at the teddy lying on the road, still tied to him.

Chiraag knew what she wanted.  "You want him?"

"Yes."

Chiraag paused for a while. "OK.. But on one condition".

The girl was looking at him with curious eyes.

"Play with him sure. But NEVER get attached with him. Do NOT love him.", He took a deep breath.  "Or anyone. It will make you mad".

Girl nodded slightly.

"Promise me you won't", he paused for a while. ".. love anyone."

The girl didn't understand what he was saying but she nodded again in affirmative.

Chiraag smiled. "You will be happy. "

He put the string in the girl's little hands and walked away. Never looking back again...

Maha Drama in Maharashtra

If you have any interest in politics-or even if you don't have but have been following news-then you must be aware of the drama that's been unfolding in Maharashtra for the post of CM and for government formation. 

Here is the gist for you as per my understading. The voters gave clear mandate to the BJP-Sena combine. All BJP and Sena had to do was to follow the deal they must have brokered before the elections. The other 2 parties NCP and Congress were nowhere in the picture. NCP boss Mr. Sharad Pawar had already said on multiple occasions that janta has given them mandate to sit in opposition.

Everything as per the script till now. Then suddenly Sena sensed an opportunity to bargain more than BJP could give. BJP also didn't relent and made it clear that CM post is non-negotiable. This tussle went on for over a week. In between Netas from both sides kept giving bites, asking the other to fall in line. Finally BJP declared they don't have the majority to form government. Sena being stubborn went to NCP and Congress to broker a new deal.

Now NCP forgot the mandate of the janta and started negotiating with both Sena and Congress.  Congress being Congress also put on their own conditions. Meanwhile Governor put Maharasthra under President rule when no one came forward to form Govt within the (arbitrary) time limit set by him. All 3 parties went continued to negatiate having multiple meetings at different levels. I don't know, if we should call it their lethargy or their greed that they couldn't come up on the same page even after meetings for 2 weeks.

Anyways, when the common goal finally seemed to be set and morning papers printed that Mr. Uddhav Thakrey will be the next Chief Minister. But BJP had another trick up their sleeve, they somehow managed to get Ajit Pawar (the formal leader of the NCP's MLAs) onboard. The same Ajit Pawar who was being investigated for various corruption charges by BJP led investigative agencies. Shockingly, within overnight the President Rule lifted by the wisdom of of our Honorable Prime Minister. The Governor also managed to wake up early morning to administer the oath to the CM and Deputy CM in front of a camera or 2. 

The Sena, Congress and Sharad Pawar's NCP predictable went to court against this. Finally SC today gave the order of televised voting within 24 hours. It was not possible for BJP to do horse trading and mass defection in such short period. So well, the Chief and Deputy Chief Ministers resigned within 4 days of administering oath. Now it seems the rest of the 3 parties will finally get a chance to form a 'khichadi' Govt (as BJP likes to call it). We may get to see 1 CM and 2 Deputy CMs now. So much for drama. 

If you enjoy this "jod-tod" politics, you must have been following up the events with glee. It definitely feels like a perfect plot of a political thriller. But I feel disgusted. 

All 4 parties are openly indulging in shredding the people's mandate into pieces. If the parties couldn't come on common platform, ideally re-elections should have happened. Let voters give a clearer mandate next time. But here everyone wants a piece of pie, whatever be the cost. 

I don't know how we people even tolerate this open horse trading? Why don't we call out these immoral acts? Why isn't BJP punished in the elections for so openly indulging in corruption? Why aren't these MLAs and MPs thrown out by the voters the next time for their greed. It's not a game, it's an insult to our democracy!  

We the people chose our MLAs and MPs and they are just so easily sellable. The parties can't even trust their own workers and ministers and have to hide them in resorts and hotels. 

I understand there are no permanent foes or friends in politics, but should that mean you don't have any ideology at all? How can BJP so easily intake the same persons behind whom they had thrown their investigative agencies? How are these people corrupt when outside BJP but suddenly become 'pure' when inside BJP? 

You may call it masterstroke of the BJP, and in a way it is. But it's a message to us that we as voters don't matter as much. They will make the Government whichever way we vote (Bihar, Karnatka and Goa are prime examples). 

I follow politics but I am more interested in Development based politics. Where people fight on real issues like air, water, transportation, health, education etc. But here only making the Government matters. That seems to be the goal of this game. Development is taken for granted. Ministries are awarded not based on the competency of a person, but based on the power of the person holding the position and how lucrative the portfolio is. 

I don't know if politics was every good in this country. May be it never will be. But right now I think we are seeing one of the lowest point in politics. I put the majority of the blame on BJP for lowering the standards in the name of "Masterstrokes". But the other parties are also responsible to a large extent. If they could have given a clean and clear alternative, clearly defined their ideology and also opposed what's clearly unethical,  people might have chosen them. 

Alas this drama seems "to be continued... "

Crossing 400 out of 1000Sher

After crossing 200 posts on this blog,  I have recently crossed 400 posts on my poetry blog 1000Sher.in too :) Again a very happy moment and a great milestone for me.

As I have written in the past too, this blog is a project to write 1000 small/big compositions in English/Hindi/Urdu over a period of life time. This was started in November 2011, so exactly 8 years later, we stand at 402 posts. While I don't know whether the project will get completed but a milestone of 400 definitely gives hope. 

It's also a great proof of what a long term persistent work looks like. That's one thing I like about blogs ( or any body of work ) that we can go back and see how far we have come. I don't know how good my compositions have been (although friends have appreciated quite a few of them, in the past ). But I am definitely proud of the efforts I have put in last 8 years. 

Yes, the frequency has come down tremendously in past few years. I am a family man now, so I don't get that much time to think and express myself in poetry form. This is one of the regrets I have for sure, but I am trying my best to get back into the groove. This daily writing experiment is a part of that thought process/plan. 

The thing with poetry for me is that I just can't write any shit like I do here on my blog. I must myself feel the content to be worth sharing even if it is 2 lines long. In the past (4-5 years ago) I use to sue  my free time in the cab to and from office to think and compose something. Most of poems that you may read on 1000Sher are written in multiple sessions of thinking and editing. But I don't get that luxury now. So now, I only write when I feel really inspired or frustrated. 

By this rate, I will probably reach the 1000 mark in next 12-15 years. But I am not in any hurry, as long as I am progressing towards that goal. 

Nowadays, I am taking help of my good friend Akshita (she was also the editor of my Novella too) to review all the past posts. With her excellent analytical skills and great command on language, I hope to make this blog error proof (or at least reach somewhere close by ). 

1000Sher has been an attempt to prove myself that I am much more than just a programmer or a good student. I am not even aspiring to be called a great poet, as long as my poetry resonates with someone's feelings and acts as a medium of self-expression. 

Hope you have a look at the blog especially the posts of last few months. Please visit the archive and see if you find something worth your taste. I am sure something will definitely click. And while you are at it, please do let me know if you find any spelling/grammatical mistakes. 

Now onto 500. Let's begin!

Being Busy

A friend of mine is calling me since last 3-4 days and I haven't been able to return his call. I have been meaning to but since it's usually long conversation with him, so I try to find a relatively big chunk of time (say 30 mins or so) to call him back.

It's no surprise that I haven't been able to find that time since last 3 days. Take today for instance : I went to doctor in the morning (a little unwell due to cold), then starting receiving calls from hospital, came back home did some office work, then went to a friend's function, then to market, then came back and again did office work. Multiple mails, calls, whatsapp messages, talk with relatives... Blah blah blah!

All the days aren't exactly like that, but they usually follow a similar theme. Sometimes life feels like we are following what's in front of us. Just going through the motions like leaves on a river. Instead of deciding a few tasks per day that would help us progress in life, and then deliberately working on them with full attention and devotion.

And like so many other things, I am sure I am not alone in having this life style. A lot of people (including probably you who is reading this) have a similar problem. Just too busy to do anything out of own will, but not doing anything worth while either.

Most of our days go in doing routine tasks. Going to office, preparing food, washing clothes, taking care of errands, PTM meetings if you are a parent etc. Even going to movie or vacations etc. becomes part of the routine. Where is the big chunk of time to just enjoy a good conversation with a friend, or probably paint, or learn an instrument or whatever you like.

If a particular segment of society has this problem, then it might be understandable. But it looks like each and everyone I know is going through the motions, just being busy, busy busy. Completing one task and then the next and then the next, until she is exhausted, burnt out or dead. Of course, at the other end of spectrum, there are people who have such much of free time that they have to indulge in some kind of addiction to cope with it!

I don't know have a solution or quick fix for this situation (otherwise I would have already self-fixed myself). But what I can definitely say is that's it's not a good situation to be in. Everyone's circumstances are different, but it's worth reflecting upon your business sometimes.

We can't get away from our obligations. Family, friends, work everything is important. But we can at least pause and think if the task at hand is worth doing? Can we not skip it or delegate it or pay someone else to do it? 

Being Busy is considered a badge of honor. But being busy doing insignificant things is a big waste of our time and potential.

PS : @XP I will call you tomorrow. Till then enjoy yourself.

When should you Write? On Inspiration or Daily?

One of the hardest aspect of writing daily blogs is to find a new topic every day. Sometimes you have an urgent or pressing issue/idea to talk about, so it's easy on those days. Sometimes, you have to think about what's bothering you or making you upset, and then share those thoughts. But other days you are just blank thinking what the heck to write today. Today was one of those days. 

A thought of skipping the day immediately comes to mind (especially when there is no one to hold you accountable for ). But then what's the use of making a promise or starting a habit when you can't keep up with it on your hard days? The next thought comes to the mind is should we write for the heck of it or should we write only when we have something worthwhile to talk about? Both ideas seem valid, so I though why not make this the subject of today's post and examine it. 

When we have something to talk about, words flow naturally, either through pen or speech. I try to keep the length of the post close to 500 words, but sometimes I easily cross 700-800 words without realizing it. When there is an itch to scratch, the thoughts are structured in a better way. We feel inspired and probably that shows to the reader too. So, it's a no-brainer to write when you have something worth writing about. 

But for how many days can you bring different ideas to write about on daily basis? It's only possible when you are living a life with a mission or experiencing different emotions, people and culture on daily basis. Not all of us are blessed with such a luck. It's probably easier to explore a single burning idea for days rather than write on a varied topics. If you are an expert, you can write a book on your area of expertise, but again you can't be expert in everything. 

Another option is to write about mundane stuffs (I ate this today, I slept at that time, I felt this and I talked to them etc. ). Kind of like a diary entry. While that's useful for some, but it doesn't appeal me. That was never my intention to start the blog . If you go through the archive of this blog, you will find posts on repeated themes, but I have always tried to do something new. I might have written in detail about a particular experience on a particular day, but you won't find a 'deary diary' kind of post. 

So, it logically follows that we should write only when we feel inspired. But, from my personal experience I can tell it's a dangerous slope to walk on. Because then there is no guarantee when you will feel inspired. And even if you feel like writing about something, not having a writing habit becomes the biggest hurdle in not expressing your thoughts. I am a living, breathing example of this way of thinking. That's the biggest reason of having just 1 post per year on average since past 3 years. 

I have had so many things to write about in these years, but I just kept giving it a miss because I didn't feel confident I had the writing acumen anymore to succinctly put my thoughts in a long form post. Or otherwise, I just procrastinated and took the easy route of watching a movie or Youtube. 

Sure writing daily is a struggle. I can tell you that I am already struggling after 20 days. And I am also acutely aware that not all of my posts of last 3 weeks are worth reading or are useful to multiple readers. But I am also sure that at least few of them would have resonated to different sets of readers. That wouldn't have been possible had I waited to 'feel inspired'. Good ideas only come when you are ready for thinking bad ideas first. If all you want is great ideas to come to your mind, you are left with No idea at all! 

So, in a nutshell, you may even find me writing a 'Dear Diary' kind of post or repeating myself in the coming days, but it's necessary to write something you might want to give your time to read. I am struggling to be a good writer, for me and for you. Bear with me in this journey (or better still, pick your pen and come along!). 

The End Never Comes

...Or let's say, it comes only when it's The End.

Since childhood we have been sold this lie that you do this or that, and the life will be gravy afterwards. 

"Complete 10th, take science and it's done." 

"Complete School, get great marks, it will be great afterwards."

"Clear Engineering Entrance and get into a good college, and then you are all set."

"Complete college with respectable marks, finally clear job interview, and life will be fine."

"Now work hard to get promoted to senior level."

"Become a manager and life will be smooth afterwards."

Initially our parents sell this lie to us, then the peers, the society, our boss. Ultimately, we start telling this lie to ourselves, actually believing it to be the truth. That you are just one step away from bliss, from Nirvana, from happily ever after. Except that last step never comes. 

Well, after 31 years, I have understood that you are never finished. You are always in the process. The end of one thing marks the beginning of next. First you need a job, then you need a better paying job, then you need a better status, then you need a car, a bigger car, a house of your own, multiple properties, stocks... Until you die. 

So, if it's a never ending process do we even need to indulge in it? Why not just make ends meet, earn a few bucks and then enjoy your life watching Netflix (or what that you like)? That's one way of living for sure, but life worth living is what brings fulfillment. 

If watching Netflix brings fulfillment to you, sure go ahead and spend hours on it. But more often than not it will be an escape to something else which might bring real fulfillment to your life. If achieving great and higher things (money, status, fame et el.) bring fulfillment then sure indulge in the rat race. 

The problem is never this rat race. The race is fine as long as you know why we are running and are happy to be its part. The problem comes when we don't realize that this rat race never ends. There will always be a rat bigger, stronger and faster than you. It will then bring discontent and hence you will run faster, exhausting yourself or taking paths that you never intended to take in the first place. 

So my advice to myself: Continue doing whatever you are doing with your life. But sometimes, just take a pause and remind yourself that life is passing by. So enjoy the process of achieving something rather than the goal itself. The end never comes. Or let's say it comes when it's The End. 

PS : Are you following my blogs regularly? Do tell which post that you liked the most this year, till now. 

भाषा में मिलावट बंद कीजिये

बहुत दिन हुए हिंदी  लिखे हुए, तो आज सोचा हिंदी में लिखा जाए।  और ये जरूरी भी है की कभी कभी अपनी भाषा में लिखा जाए।  आज हम हिंदी का एक वाक्य भी बिना अंग्रेजी के शब्द जोड़े नहीं बोल सकते।  दो वाक्य  हिंदी के बोलके अंग्रेजी पर लौट जाते हैं। और कई बार अपनी बोली में हिंदी ( या कहें हिंदुस्तानी ) का सही शब्द ही नहीं ढूँढ पाते और मजबूरन अंग्रेजी के लफ्ज़ घुसाने ही पड़ते हैं। हमारी भाषा ऐसी हो गई है जैसे धोबी का कुत्ता - ना घर का ना घाट का। मैं क्योंकि हिंदी का जानकार हूँ तो इसी पर लिखूंगा, लेकिन मुझे पूरा यकीन है की यही हाल भारत की अन्य भाषाओँ का भी है।  

मैंने खुद से पढ़ना लिखना ही हिंदी के कॉमिक्स और अखबार पढ़के सीखा था।  लेकिन धीरे-धीरे अंग्रेजी पर जोर पड़ता गया और खासकर दसवीं के बाद हिंदी कहीं पीछे छूटती गई।  आज भी कभी-कभी शायरी हिंदी/उर्दू में कर  लेता हूँ, लेकिन वही अंग्रेजी के 'टूल्स' का सहारा लेके ( ये लेख भी उन्ही उपकरणों का सहारा लेके लिख रहा हूँ )।  आज आलम ये है की कोई हिंदी में २ शब्द लिखने को कह दे  तो शायद सही से ना लिख सकूं।  आप लोग जो इसे पढ़ रहे होंगे उन्हें भी थोड़ा समय लग रहा होगा, इसे पढ़ने भी।  हम अंग्रेजी के आदि ही इतना हो गए हैं।  अंग्रेजी हमारे जीवन के हर हिस्से में घर कर गई है।  हमारा स्मार्टफोन, हमारे लैपटॉप के कीबोर्ड भी अंग्रेजी में ही होते हैं, तो स्वाभाविक है की ज्यादातर हम अंग्रेजी ही  लिखेंगे और पढ़ेंगे।  

मगर सवाल ये है की ऐसा क्यों ? क्या इसके  लिए अंग्रेजी ज़िम्मेदार है या हमारा समाज जो हिंदी पर इतना जोर देता है ? मेरा मानना है की इसके लिए  हम खुद  ज़िम्मेदार हैं।  मुझे अंग्रेजी से कोई अप्पति नहीं , अंग्रेजी आज की जरूरत है और इसे कोई झुठला नहीं सकता।  लेकिन क्या हमें अपनी भाषा पर इतना भी पकड़ नहीं रही की अपनी मातृभाषा (फिर वो चाहे हिंदी हो या कोई और भारतीय भाषा ) में कुछ वाक्य बिना 'मिलावाट' के लिख या बोल सकें ? 

अभी कुछ समय पहले हमारे गृह मंत्री का बयान आया की हिंदी ही देश को जोड़ सकती है।  इस पर काफी कोहराम भी मचा।  मैं इस बात से पूरी तरह सहमत नहीं। अगर बात जोड़ने की ही है तो हिंदी से ज्यादा अंग्रेजी ये काम बेहतर ढंग से कर सकती है।  ये बात सही है की हिंदी का प्रचार-प्रसार होना चाहिए।  अगर ज्यादा से ज्यादा हम भारतीय हिंदी बोलेंगे तो एक दूसरे को समझने में और सहायता होगी।  लेकिन अगर गैर हिंदी भाषियों से अगर ये आशा रखी जाए तो क्या हमारा ये फ़र्ज़ नहीं की हम भी उनकी भाषाओँ और बोलियों को और ज्यादा अपनाएँ ? दक्षिण राज्यों में तो कई जगह कुछ हद तक हिंदी सिखाई जाती है, लेकिन उत्तर के राज्यों में हम कितना मराठी, तेलुगु या बंगाली सीखते हैं ? 

अगर उद्देश्य देश को  जोड़ने का है तो सारी भारतीय भाषाओं में इतना दम है की वो ये काम अच्छे से कर सकें।  लेकिन अंग्रेजी या देश की दूसरी भाषा को सीखने से पहले क्या ये जरूरी नहीं की हम अपनी खुद की बोली और भाषा को सम्मान दें ? अंग्रेजी बोलिये लेकिन जब जरूरत और समय हो, वर्ना यकीन मानिये हिंदुस्तानी बहुत अच्छी लगती है लिखने और बोलने में।  

तो अगर आप ये पढ़ रहे हैं तो कोशिश कीजिये कभी-कभी अपनी भाषा में भी लिखये बोलिये और पढ़िए। और कोशिश करें कि  मिलावटी भाषा से बचें।  जब हिंदी में लिखें  तो केवल हिंदी और जब अंग्रेजी में लिखें तो केवल अंग्रेजी।  इससे दोनों भाषाओं का सम्मान होगा। थोड़ा मुश्किल लगेगा शुरू में, लेकिन थोड़ा सा ध्यान लगाने पर ये अवश्य किया जा सकता है।  मैं भी आज से कोशिश करूँगा।  

Our Multi-Talented Netas

Most of us work in some company or not, to higher or lower post, but as workers nonetheless. Now you can work on another side gig, but try disclosing this to your company and see their reaction. They would make you read (and probably re-sign) the contract that you had signed while joining the company. You are simply not allowed to work anywhere else until you are on the payroll of a certain company.

Then how come our politicians whose job of being an MLA or MP should be a full time one, are allowed to do all kinds of things from judging comedy and music shows to doing cricket commentary? Why are there different sets of rules for our Ministers and for the Janta?

Today's blog is provoked by this news article informing most of the officials who were supposed to attend the meeting to discuss Delhi's toxic air pollution chose not to attend it! I mean how dare they?! The children and families of these officials should be forced to live in this toxic environment whole year around. May be when they will see their loved ones getting ill, they might take this issue seriously.

While it's an emergency like situation in Delhi right now, but Delhi's (and in fact most of North India's) pollution level remains worrisome all year around. Just imagine : you are inhaling toxic year ever second of your life since past many years. Just imagine the havoc this must be creating to your internal systems, eating you up from inside bit by bit.

Supreme Courts and High courts are continuously summoning the officials and making them answerable. Still our shameless politicians and officials are either busy squabbling or just don't care!

One person out of this list of absentees stands out: Gautam Gambhir. I respect him a lot as a straight talking person . But this is the same man who till a few months was saying that his criticism of Delhi Government was just as an ordinary citizen and he had no plans for joining politics. Anyways, he joined and people like him are welcome. Although I don't like the fact that there are so many party workers who work day and night to give strength to the party and all these celebrities come out of blue during election times, get tickets and win on the strong mandate of the party's face. But that's another point.

Gautam Gambhir is just a case in point. My larger point is that if you are a politician ( of any political party ), and an elected representative whether an MP or MLA you should be dedicated to the development and issues of your area full time. Yes, you should be allowed to take breaks and vacations and have hobbies and downtime just like rest of us. Yes, if your salary is less then it should be increased proportionately. You should get handsome perks so that you feel motivated to work .

But how come you are allowed to have other commercial interests like running TV channels or IT companies or doing cricket commentary etc. ? These people must only be allowed to become ministers if they quit their existing commercial interests.

All these people especially our MPs are only seen or heard while making some controversial statements or during election times. I myself see my MP only on posters while giving wishes on Diwali/New Year etc. or taking credit for any scheme launched by the Central Govt. Why are they not seen front and center raising our issues in the Parliament, getting the additional grants, launching schemes or development work in our respective areas?

Our politicians are non-serious when it comes to our welfare and that's why we are lagging in so many areas. If all our MPs and MLAs get to work and at least do the tasks assigned to them (beside their party whip) , there is no problem we can solve in a quick span of time. 

As per another report, Delhi is the most polluted city on Earth. The question is, is anybody listening?

Article 370 : 100 Days

Just like Ayodhya/Ram Mandir issue, this article 370 has also been a point of contention for as long as I can remember. As complex as this Article 370 (and its supplementary article 35A) is to understand, it's really confusing to make up your mind about it. 

Here's a short version to understand. When Pakistan tried to invade Kashmir by force soon after partition, Kashmir's then King Raja Hari Singh asked for help from India to protect his kingdom. India put down the condition to sign the instrument of accession as a precondition to help Hari Singh. This Article 370 was included into the constitution to allow Kashmir to have its own constitution and prime minister while enjoying the protection of India. The article of course was supposed to be temporary measure and a plebiscite was supposed to be done by the Kashmiris (to choose either to go with India or Pakistan) after Pakistan remove their army from the POK area. Pakistan never demilitarized the area, and so plebiscite never happened. In effect, this so called 'temporary' article became permanent. The successive governments diluted the provisions in Article 370 slowly but the Article itself never got removed. That's what the current Indian Govt has done. 

Let me start by first congratulating the Modi Govt for taking a risky step ( just like Demonetization for which also I commend the Govt. ). No other Govt had the political will to do this. This Article either had to be removed permanently or should have been made permanent in nature. Ultimately, No one in India would like 2 different sets of laws governing different parts of the nation. 

Prime Minister Modi and our diplomats have also successfully defended our move. They have more or less stamped our authority that this is India's internal matter and no country is allowed to comment on it. Almost all countries (except a few here and there and of course Pakistan ) have accepted India's position on this matter. But it's also true that Pakistan has been successful in making all countries note the situation in Kashmir (which still remains in lock down by Indian authorities). So, a lot of countries have an eye on how the situation unfolds in the coming days.  

I don't like the way it was done : by giving a false narrative of terrorist attack and increasing security personnel in Kashmir and then putting all the Kashmiri leaders under house arrest. J&K has further been bifurcated into two UTs. This may make it more manageable for Indian Govts to rule but the state and its leaders should also have been informed at least (if not consulted) before taking such a step. But given the situation of Kashmir I don't think there was any other 'proper' way to do it. 

Now, I understand considering the sensitivity of the issue and the vicinity of the area to the LOC, proper security arrangements had to be made. But now it's 100 days since it all started. Some relaxations have been made like providing the landlines and postpaid connections but Internet still remains shut. Life just hasn't been normal in Kashmir since August 5. An average Indian would not just want Kashmir but Kashmiris too. 

I don't know how it can been done but the need of the hour is to take Kashmiris in confidence. To make them realize that we are with them and there is no difference between them and us. Also, no one is going to steal their land or to take away their girls (like some potty-mouth politicians have said). And while talks are all what we can do right now, mere talks are not enough. Fast and concrete action is also needed. If the tourism industry of Kashmir is promoted, new industries and higher education institutes are built and Kashmiris are welcomed all over India, then I am sure they will accept this decision sooner or later. 

It's easier said then done. Pakistan and its sponsored terrorists organization will never let lasting peace remain in Kashmir. They will continue to incite Kashmiris against India in the form of stone pelting and doing mind wash of gullible people to take up militancy. But if we have taken up the decision to finally integrate Kashmir as a permanent and unbreakable part of India, then all these challenges and problems are bound to be part and parcel of this decision. 

I just hope the Modi Govt owns up this issue, even if there are setback on the way, and doesn't go hiding like they did in Demonetization. Just like Ayodhya, this country needs permanent peace in Kashmir too. 

Mandir Vahin Banega!

I wrote about Ram Mandir/Babri Masjid dispute just before the verdict. Now that the verdict has confirm and a lot of people have given their views, I thought it warrants another post elaborating my own views on the verdict. 

First of all, I commend Supreme Court for giving an unanimous judgement on something which just a few days seemed like an impossible task. Having a clear verdict and not going the way of dividing the land gives hope of lasting peace. The Supreme Court has also done a balancing act of giving away 5 Acres of land within Ayodhya to Muslim party so that no one goes with a feeling of having 'lost the case'. 

However, the final verdict definitely seems to favor the faith of a party over the facts and the laws of the land. This doesn't seem right, but I believe it's for the greater good. Because I am dead sure giving that piece of land to Muslim Party would never bring lasting peace. Babri Masjid was razed, if another mosque would have come up now, ultimately that would have got destroyed too. It sounds harsh and unfair but that's the truth. The honorable judges have given the verdict based on a technicality that Hindu Parties presented their case better than Muslims, but I believe they would have kept this point of lasting peace in mind too. 

But all in all, this verdict seems to be more of a mediation than a final judgement on a title suit. If it had to come to this only, I just wish it could have come much much earlier by mediation between the parties themselves. So much enmity could have been avoided and our collective time and energy would have been saved. 

Asaduddin Owaisi has asked the Muslim community to refuse taking the 'compensatory' piece of land saying that they don't want 'alms' and they can themselves buy another piece if they ever wanted. I partially agree with him and can understand his sentiments. But the fact is, in these communal times people and administration in Ayodhya wouldn't allow a Grand Mosque anywhere near the vicinity of proposed temple. Now, that court has ordered this, one can hope there won't be any more trouble at the probable Mosque place. 

I hope Muslim party take the piece of land that's given to them and build a mosque or any other structure to their liking . They may not like it but asking for judicial review or refusing land will only make them look like 'evil'. 

Court and Govt should also ensure that no such disputes happen for any other place. There are so many places where Muslim structure have come up over Hindu places during Mughal period, but we have much more pressing tasks to take care of in our present rather than trying to correct the wrongs of the past. A lot of bloodshed has already happened over Ayodhya. No more Kashi and Mathura should be 'baaki' now. 

A lot of people have asked this question and I also wonder, what would have been the verdict had the Babri Masjid still been there on the site? Would court have ordered its demolition? If court says that placing of idols and demolition of mosque was an illegal act and a contempt of court, then how come it kinda validates the act by allowing the same parties (or their sympathizers) who did this act the power to build a temple? If razing of mosque was illegal, when will the accused be convicted? 

The coverage of media has been completely biased. Bringing all these Maulanas and Muslim scholars only to be bashed by anchor, the other participants and even  the audience. I was shocked to see that even before the verdict had come a few channels were covering it with Lord Ram's photo prominently on display and Ram Bhajans in the background! Either they knew what the verdict was going to come or they had made up their mind about the the 'right' verdict should be. Media persons can have their preferences but this blatant bias of Media is just not good. 

People have fought like lunatics over this Ram Temple. But if Lord Ram would themselves have been around, I am sure he would have refused such a temple. In any case, as I said at the Starting that Supreme Court has in its flawed but commendable verdict tried to pacify both parties in the hope of lasting peace. I hope that happens. 

All said and then, I will wait for both the Grand Temple and new Mosque to be built now and will visit both of them when I visit my hometown. Jai Shri Ram!

Post #200

Yes you read that right. This is my 200th published post on this blog! Quite happy having achieved this feat and rebooting this blog. I must have written about the story of this blog earlier too, but let me write it again from what my memory serves.

So this goes all the way back to 2006, when I had just finished school. That's when I first read about blogs for the first time (by the way,blog is short for Web-log). I was sold about its prospects. But internet was in its infancy at that time and I would get a connection of my own 4 years later.

Never mind, with the rise of Orkut etc. I was getting a hang of Internet. So, I also created a blog of my own around 2007-08. It was on this Blogger platform only. I don't even remember the name of the blog now, but I distinctly remember it had a light pink theme! Anyways, I wrote something like "It's my first post and great things are gonna come soon". Well those great things never came because I never wrote anything else there. 

Meanwhile my school friends started their own blogs and writing posts and poems etc. I would diligently read them during my weekly cyber-cafe visits and give elaborate comments. Then came Twitter and Google Buzz etc. and I was very active there. So we can say my blogging journey kinda started through those comments on various social platforms.

Then came 2010 and I finally got an internet connection of my own (no more having to go to Cyber cafe for limited time. Hurray!). And I immediately started my own blog. It was a slow but steady start. My initial plan was to write once a week, and while I took double that time on an average, it was still a fair start. With encouragements from friends, I was just happy having a place of my own to write.

Design wise also this blog has gone with many permutations and combinations . I have spent literally hours tweaking this blog by moving the widgets around and fibling with the fonts. Now, I try to keep the blog to its bare minimum design, with only the 'Essentials'.  I think now the blog gets out of the way of the reader and lets anyone interested read without any distraction. If you don't agree with my assessment, do let me know. I may do something it, probably.

This blog has seen many ups and down since 2010. Some years I have been on a roll, some not so much. The blog all of a sudden came to a stand still since last 3 years and I just couldn't make myself break the shackles. But hopefully, I have done it now.  

Of course any writer would like dozens(hundreds/thousands/millions)  of readers lapping up whatever she writes. I am no exception. I crave interaction. But even if no one reads or comments, I am just happy and grateful for this opportunity to bare out my mind. That's why this blog is called 'An Open Source Mind' i.e. AnOSM Blog !

I don't know what the future holds for this blog, but let's hope I get serve you a lot of interesting posts .  Meanwhile, for nostalgia sake, read the one from where the journey began. If you ever read and appreciated even a single post of mine - Thank You.

PS : Don't forget to checkout my other blogs : the one for poetry and the one for short posts. Not updated them for a while but 'sabka time aayega'. 

A Slave of Phone

My name is Ravi Singh and I am an addict.

I am constantly wired to my digital devices:  smartphone, iPad and laptop. Juggling between the three, sometimes accessing all 3 at a time, charging them, mindlessly checking them. My wife fights with me that I am more into digital life than 'real life'. And she is true.

I lack daily dose of real human interaction and in a way it hampers my social life as well. The solution is simple but not easy. The only way I get over any addiction is to completely nuke it. I have left most of the social media, except Youtube and Whatsapp. Otherwise at one point I was in a habit of compulsively checking FB and Twitter . I am also a news junkie, craving for any new news giving me a dopamine hit.

It doesn't feel good having to talk about negative aspects of your life (unless you like people pitying you). But I am quite aware that all of us are slaves of our digital bricks to some extent or other. So, it's certainly not just my problem. 

When I was in college, I didn't use to carry any phone . I used to have a bit of a problem but with help of a few friends, I managed it quite beautifully. And I can say for sure that 99% of the time I never felt I am missing something without having a mobile in my pocket. It inconvenienced others more than me!

But when I joined office and went out of Delhi, I had to buy a phone to keep in touch with my family and friends. It was fine even till then, because Smartphones weren't mainstream by that time yet. But then by the time 2013 came, I bought my first smartphone and that spelled doom.

If you read Digital Minimalism (I read it half on my dreaded iPad), the author has very elaborately explained how Smartphones and Social Media platforms are designed to keep us hooked. To make us crave them when we aren't accessing them. It's like carrying a drug with you 24x7 and you can take a hit at anytime you like (or they like).

The book gives a solution but I haven't come to that part yet ( I have been busy checking social media on phone, call that irony). So, I don't know currently whether I will ever be able to bring a Digital balance to my life . But I do feel that it's necessary more than ever to a put a limit to both your digital and social media use. 

I am not propagating the notion to start using that time for 'real human interactions', although that won't hurt. But you may be an introvert like me, so you can use that time to contemplate, or exercise or just read a Good damn physical book!

The aim of this book was to accept one of my flaws and also to act as an intervention for you to pause and think about your own usage of phone and social media. If it's in check, great! Mazel tov! But if not, can you do something about it?

Be Creative or Die

For those who have known me since past 10 years or so have seen me producing different kinds of written content, some average, some stupid but sometimes brilliant and worth connecting too. And it's not just about writing blogs, stories or poems. I had written satires, I tried my hand in writing Hindi content, I recited poems, created spoofs and then created my own songs, comics and various other stuffs.

But in past 5 years I have found myself going through long patches of being away from doing something for me. It has been mostly "work" or family obligation. You get good in what you do, I have grown in confidence as a professional worker and also in handling family responsibilities. Past 5 years or so have also seen me becoming more and more of a passive consumer of content than an active creator or contributor. 

While there are always ups and downs in life and I have faced a lot of personally difficult moments, but in terms of expectations and the flow of the day, the life has become monotonous. And that suffocates you, because life is not just about living in luxury or pleasure. Life is about struggle and triumphs. And you won't experience that struggle and triumph if you don't even try. If you don't come out of your comfort zone, that comfort zone will keep getting smaller until it crushes you inside.

So, while I concentrated on getting my personal life in order, this creative person in me has died a slow death. This has led to me doubting myself that if I can ever achieve that type of consistency, variety or quality in my writing. Life is different from how it was 5 years ago, I have become older (probably more mature too), with more family obligations (being married) and less free or personal time to indulge in creativity.

There are some of my friends who will keep marching forward no matter their state of life. They will photograph or sing or dance or paint, no matter what the occasion. It's what they live for.  Beside being jealous, I also have immense respect for consistent content creators. Because when I don't consistently do a little bit of that in my own life then I feel I am falling behind in life.

On the other hand, I have seen so many of my ultra creative friends becoming high earning, high class workers. in their case, I have tried to encourage them hoping to revive the creativity in them. Kind of like you giving a CPR to a person on the verge of dying. And that's what I believe in. If the creativity has been sucked out of you, you are more or less dead from inside. If all you do is spec work, working 40-50 hours a week while waiting for weekends, then all you are waiting for is death to arrive. 

Being Creative doesn't mean you must be having a lot of followers or must produce viral content day in day out. Creativity for me, is just creating something out of nothing, with no knowledge of whether your creation will work or not. Creativity is all about trying and expressing yourself. It's acceptable to me even if it's 'mediocre' by some random standard, as long as you created it without any spec or obligation. 

Creativity is a reward of its own. When I write, even if it's shit, I feel good because I can then consider myself different from so many of my peers who are good in their profession but that's all that they know of. On the other hand, when I go for a sufficiently long time without creating anything in any form, I start feeling anxious of losing my time on this earth. 

I believe you get to live only once, and what you create as your own in the form of an entertainment, information or connection is going to be your legacy. This blog, if it remains online will become a part of my body of work. Probably someone will visit it someday and go through my old posts to gauge into my thinking and emotions at that time. May be they will be able to connect to what I write because they felt something similar. It's a fantasy alright but it's worth pursuing. 

So, if you are reading this, I would again plead you to find sometime out of your daily life and do something of your own. It can be anything. It can be even related to your profession as long as you do it out of your own will and not for some other person and company. Just create something and if you feel like then share it with the world. Heck, share it with me! And then do it again the next day. 

Be Creative. Or Die. 

The Time to do Anything.

We all have a natural time to do everything. Time to sleep, time to wake up refreshed, time to eat and time to work etc. And while we are taught early to bed and early to rise, that schedule doesn't work best for everyone ( including me ). Everyone's circadian cycle is different. Whether that can be reset permanent is what I am not sure of. But what's definitely sure is that when you do something out of your best time to do it, then you can't put your best efforts in it (redundant statement?).

So, I wonder what's the best time to scratch your creative itch? As you know, I am trying to write daily and have been fairly successful in past 9 days. However, currently I am writing it at almost the fag end of the day. That's when I get some time without the distraction of phones and work. But on the other hand, the mind is tired by then from all BS of the day, so it's difficult to think clearly. Moreover, I take on the self-inflicted pressure of publishing something before the clock turns 12. While it's good to keep myself focused, I am not sure if I am able to put my best thoughts forward this way.

Earlier I used to follow a weekly schedule, trying to write something every weekend. It worked great when I was a on a roll, but other times I would go post-less for weeks and months. The worst writer's block I faced in past 3 years when I wrote only 3 posts in over 1000 days. What matters in any creative pursuit is the consistency. If you are not consistent, it doesn't matter how much talent you have.

I can only sustain something if I push myself to do it daily, whether it's exercise or writing or learning something or making a reading habit. So, while that aspect of my life is clear to me, what I am never able to make my mind is  the best time to do anything. Ideally, getting your personal goals out of the way before you start serving others is the best way to go about it. But when the life takes over your dreams, I invariably tend to push my personal goals towards the end of the day, and then finally sprinting to do them for namesake or just skipping them altogether and getting frustrated.

I guess I am not the only, anyone who pursues something out of the mundane has to struggle with this. Probably this struggle, this resistance, is the inherent part of the creative process and you can't escape from it.

So, well this time instead of preaching, I ask for advice. As I struggle to find the best time to write and how to keep that free, if you do something personally enriching daily, do let me know when and why you do them at a certain time?

I will wait for your comments as I hit 'Publish' and then go and finish my lemon ice tea now.

Demonetisation. Why keep people in dark?

I just watched this video very elaborately describing Demonetization story :  the process and the ill-effects of it .

I still remember the time I heard this news on 8th November 2016. I was in office. I thought it was a Masterstroke.  80% of the currency gone within an instant, now what the heck will the money-hoarders do! Thinking from Common-sense it did seem like a Master-stroke only.

But I forgot a lot of things. First, It's India. To varying extent we all are corrupt (sounds harsh but it's true). So the most corrupt of us all will do every jugaad available to save their black money . And they did exactly that. Second, while I had already switched largely to cashless modes of payment, not all of us had. In fact, most of India still is very much dependent on Cash. How are they going to manage with almost zero money (nobody keeps large amount of money in denominations of 100s and less). Third, are we really prepared to handle such a big currency change  exercise all over the country? 

It seems, just like me, the Govt. forgot all of this too. There was almost zero preparation and the rules were changed on daily basis for next 2 months. And from there the fantasy became a nightmare. Thankfully I had just a single 500 Rupee note and I was mostly able to manage that phase with various online and cashless transaction modes . But I saw my father having to stand in line for hours to get little sum of money to buy ration for home among other things. I myself stood in line on his behalf only to go empty handed. 

Well we all were facing this difficulty thinking this as a small contribution and sacrifice for the benefit of the nation. But 3 years after the event it's pretty much clear that there was absolutely no positive that came out of this exercise. 

But let's be honest, most of us from common sense thought it was a brilliant decision. The Govt took a big risk there, probably for electoral benefit but also to improve economy trying to be a messiah of Janta. It was an electoral hit but a economical miss. But, now that it failed we can't just escape from our previous predictions and just blame the Govt. This kind of exercise was never performed in the world so we didn't know what would be the short and long term effects. 

So, I am OK if Govt tried something and it failed. What I hate about this Govt is that it would never take the responsibility of such a big disaster. Have you ever seen any minister or our very own PM admitting it was an honest mistake? Such a historic step taken and nobody talks about it since last 2 years. And even if they do, they still somehow try to reason it was a great decision (I remember the then FM Jaitley ji's multiple blogs). 

We were told that the blip in economy is due to short term effects, in long term it would be beneficial, but now 3 years down the line the economy is at its worst state. So, why not admit it?! Hundreds of people died standing in line. There death should account for something. Lacs lost their jobs in informal sectors, someone should be answerable to them. Bankers worked overtime to get everything in order. Nobody accountable for their hard work going waste? 

People were shown some dreams and asked to make sacrifices and people did. Don't these people at least deserve to be told honestly that none of those dreams materialize? Why keep people in dark? 

Mandir Vahin Banayenge?

If you live in India and haven't been living in a borewell, then you would know that the verdict on Ram-Mandir/Babri Masjid case will probably come on or before 17 November. Like me you might have also been reading and watching news about how the Govt and the various religious organizations are preparing themselves for the verdict, appealing for peace and appealing for maintaining communal harmony, and how the people of Ayodhya are on their toes, some even leaving their homes, fearing the worse.

This is a very dangerous topic to comment on in public, but I will take my chances. Speaking your mind, even if you are wrong or not with the popular view is very important. And like me you are also entitled for your own opinion and are free to express it, preferably in the comment section. But first hear me out. 

First of all I consider myself an agnostic, and am not an overtly religious kind. I don't muddle with anyone's religious practices and prefer not to comment on it either, because religion is a very private thing. I believe no should come between you and your God, or tell you how you should maintain relationship with your God. 

My only problem lies when someone is forced to participate in any religious procession when they are not inclined to, or if public gets inconvenience due to some else's religious practices. Playing loudspeakers on inhumanly hours for Azaans and Jagrans , the rowdiness of Kanwars etc. are a few good examples of it. So, now when I make a comment on this case, you probably have an idea from where I am coming from.

Here are some of my thougths...

Ram is one of our Hindu Gods and quite popular in Northern India. But I don't think any other God's name has been misused more than Ram. "Ram" is used to get votes, "Ram" is used to incite mob mentality. "Ram" is used to even start riots and justify violence and murder etc. Just have a look into this series and this documentary, which I believe have been made very objectively. If these videos don't show the full side of the picture, please do provide me with other facts. I am always willing to change my mind when presented with new facts and ideas.

But for now, based on above videos, let's be clear that Ram Janmbhoomi is a matter of faith, and has no historical proof (The ASI report only tells there was a Hindu Temple or a structure similar to it, but no evidence on which God ). Where exactly Ram as a human was born, no one can tell. Heck, most of us can't tell exactly where we were born ( in which bed of which room of which hospital?) .  So, if this piece of land has to be given for building a Ram Temple, it would be only to pander the sentiments of the Majority Hindu group. Those same sentiments which have been cleverly and consistently stoked by certain religious organizations for their own gains and purposes.  If Ram Temple was such a big issue, it should have been on national imagination from the starting and not from the late 80s when the infamous Rath Yatras were organized.

I accept Mughals were cruel. I accept they would have done numerous atrocities on the people of that time. I agree numerous temples have been broken under there watch (but no one knows how many). But does this justify hating today's Muslims calling them the descendants of those Muslim Rulers of past? Is it required to break down the structures of those times to ensure we get "justice" ? Well if we do have to do it, then  Britishers didn't do any less atrocities on us and looted our wealth too (Mughals at least didn't take it away). So, why don't we start hating all the historical structures of British period also, let's start with boycotting English language itself!

Let's for a moment consider there really was a Ram Temple there. But still the acts of installing the Ram Idols by breaking locks or pulling down Babri Masjid etc. both against the orders of court, does it really heed well for us as a society or Hindu Culture?  Even after over 25 years of breaking the Babri Masjid no one has been able to make a Temple there and we have to wait for court order only.  Even today's Modi Govt. always mentioning the Ram Temple its manifesto always says let's wait for court order. If we ultimately had turn to courts only for final order then why do contempt of their orders in the first place?

A note to the Muslim community leaders too, especially the ones fighting this case in court. I heard some rumors of an out of court settlement too. I agree bringing down Babri Masjid was a crime and everyone involved in it should get appropriate punishment. But wasn't there any chances of you guys softening your position over these years? Was Babri Masjid even more important than the lives of fellow Hindus and Muslims who have been killed brutally in multiple riots? From the way sentiments have been flamed, I am sure this issue won't stop even if Court gives final verdict in Muslim side favor. I can clearly see that, but why can't you? Yes, it requires sacrifice from your side, but bringing long lasting peace by resolving this issue isn't worth it? If you are afraid this will give impetus to Mandir demands at other places, then why don't you resolve all such issues together, probably asking for Masjid protection at other places in lieu of giving up this title. Yes, you can say that why only Muslims have to make sacrifice, but sometimes we also need to be practical about situations. 

I personally don't care if Ram Temple doesn't get built there (agnostic remember). But if it does get built, it would definitely be huge relief for me. At least we Indians will get over our fixation of this issue and hopefully start caring about more pressing issues like our poverty, climate change, pollution, water scarcity, abysmal infrastructure, poor education, malnutrition, lack of jobs and opportunities etc. Ultimately whatever verdict comes out in this case, I also hope all these religious organizations and Govt etc. actually respect the verdict and even if it needs challenging, it be done within constitutional framework. 

We are going through a delicate phase with the economy being "khatre me" and lots of unemployed frustrated youth waiting for an opportunity to vent out their anger somehow. I hope Lord Ram blesses us with a better senses and cooler heads. More than Ram Temple we need Ram in our temple. Jai Shri Ram!!

The Voice of a Writer

I believe every writer has a voice. While a writer by definition puts written words on paper, but when you read them you get a sense of familiarity. I don't know what defines a writer's voice, it may be the tone of the passage (authoritative vs reflective), the length of the sentences (short exclamatory ones vs long sermons) or  the usage of words (simple vs terse) or the topics they choose to write on (philosophy, politics, historical fiction etc.). Or it may be something completely different. But what's true is that an accomplished writer's content will always distinguish her from her peers.

I wonder what I sound like while getting read. Do I really making sense? Are my blogs (and other content) really something to read and relate to, or is just something to skim or may be completely avoid? Do I write from experience thus bringing authenticity, or does it all just sound phony (and probably even narcissistic). Do I really bring value through my blogs or have I made it just a task to complete before sleeping? Of course, I am not a pro (yet), but do I even qualify as a 'serious amateur'? Am I just an imposter? These are some of questions that I struggle with whenever I sit down to write.

And there are no easy answers to this. I can't really just go to my friends and ask them how do I sound as a writer? Well, I can, but it won't serve the purpose, because everyone will speak up from their own life experiences and depending on the dynamics of my relationship with them.

I guess I will find out myself at some point through the sheer process of writing itself. I am not sure if it will ever happen, but I am hopeful. This makes writing itself as a form of self-discovery. Finding your voice, having confidence in it, is akin to truly finding yourself.

And while writing is my weapon of choice, I highly encourage you to think in your life what creative talent is buried inside you. Something that you have always wanted to developed, but either never started or just struggled to carry on for long. Or probably life came in between. May be there was too much friction. 

Just like a writer, every artist has a voice too (in fact "Writers" are just a subset of  "Artists").  By birth, you are an artist, we all are. No doubt about it. But we don't get to call ourselves that until we create something. Just like I don't get to call myself a writer until I write regularly. 

When I was a kid, I was a fan of WWF (later rechristened as WWE). The Rock was my favorite. Of course his wrestling moves were one of a kind, but more than that, the way he handled the crowed, his dialog delivery, his charisma, his cockiness... his segments were always electrifying. He probably wasn't the most talented or most powerful in terms of pure wrestling talent, but he had a voice. A distinct one, which no one else could match. So, when Dwyane Johnson left WWE to pursue his acting career, I was heartbroken. While I did continue to watch WWE for a few more years, but it was never really the same after he left. 

That's what I call having a voice. The Rock had it, My favorite Authors Seth Godin, Steven Pressfield, Robert Green, Charles Duhigg etc. have it. A lot  of others whom I follow on social media (GaryVee, Tony Robbins, Shekhar Gupta etc.) have it. I wish I develop that voice someday and I wish you develop it in your own creative pursuit. Good Luck. 

Goals Vs Life

How times has it happened with you? You don't like something or are stuck. So you decide to make a grand change, or to improve something or to chase a goal. You pump yourself up, make a grand plan and swear to God that THIS time you are going to achieve your goal, or make a permanent change to your life.

And for a few days (or hours) everything goes fine as well, almost exactly as you had envisioned. But then... Life happens. And it always does. That's the only task of life. To happen. For shit to hit the fan. Life's geometry doesn't have straight lines or tangents. It's always made up of tiny (and sometimes huge) sine waves. Ups and Downs. Ebbs and Flow. Crest and Trough.

And that's where the problem arises. You think you will get the same variables everyday, the same cards that you played with on the first day you decided to make the change. But life keeps changing cards everyday (and sometimes doesn't even give you a hand).

That's what separates true achievers from bluffers. "When the going gets tough, the tough gets going" is cliched but true. And while we are talking of cliches : success only tastes sweet after tasting a few bitter pills of failures and setbacks.

I am currently following a schedule of writing at night. So when I sit to write, the emotions are different everyday, depending on how the day went. I haven't written for too many days, but already sometimes I feel clueless about what to write on. And other times while I start, I go blank thinking how to take the blog forward. What good do I have to say anyway?

Of course, writing for the heck of it doesn't make sense either. It's not an essay and I am not getting evaluated and given marks here. I don't want this blog to be another "dear diary" either. Ultimately, the goal is write something of value, if not for you then at least for me.

So, when I hit a road block, I have to remind myself that it won't be gravy always. If the goal is to write daily then I will have to grind sometimes, and not wuss out. It won't always be like this, but good days will come only when I survive these bad days.

The principles remain the same whatever be the goal. It's writing for me, it may be running or dieting or dancing for you. Ultimately it's all about settling in with a process and not allowing the wear and tear of everyday life to hinder your progress. If you want success you have to own the sacrifices too. You can't get one without the other. 

You can't be at your best every day either. Sometimes you have to work at your worst also. And those are the days that define you. If it was that easy everybody would have done it. 

I have written this short blog full of cliches, today. I don't know what tomorrow holds, but for now I can go to sleep knowing I have paid my dues for today. Time for you to pay yours?

PS : Reading and not giving your views ain't cool. 

I want to be a fiction writer.

If you are reading this, I have a ask from you. But let's come to that in a moment. Let me first tell you the story of how my first novella came into being - The Eleventh Hour (if you don't know it already).

So, I never intend to write a long form story. It started back in 2012 (when the world was about to end). I was a newly minted writer exploring different forms of writing mediums. I started writing a few scenes and describing them as a series of post. I initially intended to write about my experience of living in Hyderabad and adjoining cities. As I was living alone for the first time in my life outside of my own city, it was an experience worth capturing.
As I wrote a few posts, people liked it on social media (I used to be an FB user then). They inquired where I was taking this story. I had no idea at all. I was so clueless, the title of the story remained "Untitled"! I was just writing it for the heck of it, improvising on the way. So, then I came back to my hometown after a few months and enthusiasm for it went down (as it usually happens with me). I left it in between after a few posts and didn't return to it for a long time.
But then buoyed by the reminders and constant encouragement from a few friends, I decided to finish it and turn it into a novel. That took sometime, I had to figure out what would happen at the end and how to make my story from the point it stood to the end I desired. I winged and raced it to completion. It was a lot of hard work but in a way fun as well. As it was my story, I could mold it in any way I want (I even wrote the end scene of the story in the middle!). Once the draft was ready, I took help of a few friends who edited, proof read and even made graphics for it. I am still thankful to them for me turned something that I started as joke, into a product that I am still proud of having created.

So, it didn't happen in a day or even in a year, but it happened, even while going through all the wears and turbulence of life.

Through stories are how we progress as a society. If you think about it, gossips are also just stories (sometimes exaggerated) about a third person or a situation. Have you ever noticed we naturally tend to gravitate towards people who always have interesting anecdotes to tell.

Writing blogs is a great way to express myself, bringing out whatever is going inside onto the paper. But I still think they aren't the most creative mediums. Deep inside, I want to write more poetry, long and short form fiction, and even satire. That's what I feel is a true form of creativity.

Today I read back one of my old stories. I liked what I read, although I could feel it's not really story with too many arcs, but just a short scene. But I was impressed with the way I made the story a medium of self-expression through the views expressed by the protagonists, even though the story had nothing to do with me.

But here's a problem for this fiction writer. I am not a natural . Writing stories takes a lot out of me, because you have to imagine scenarios and invent characters. That's the reason, I could never write another novella.

I have been carrying a bunch of story ideas in my head for years now, but I haven't gotten around writing any of them. Because it's one thing to have an idea and it's totally different to be able to develop it into something worth writing and then reading. A story has a beginning, a middle and an end and I usually have only a portion of it figured out.

Anyways, the point of this blog is not to complain about my inability to write fiction. It's to spur myself into at least starting something new.

So, here is the ask : If you are reading this, just go through some of my old stories embedded in the links in this post (if you haven't read them already or have forgotten them). Please let me know if you like them, and would like to read more of them. Who knows with sufficient encouragement I might be able to overcome my inertia. Never hurts to take help of friends ;)

A Bunch of Thoughts

Again in the spirit of Removing Friction, I am just stating a bunch of thoughts here. These are random thoughts which may not have any correlation (or may be they have). May be in future,  I will make them as themes of my future blog posts (or may be I won't). But some of them have been going on in my head for far too long. It's just better, if I can put them on (virtual) paper.

Note that these are my personal opinions or experiences, laden with the biases of my own world view. So while we can discuss on them, but these are not up for argument or explanation from me.

OK, so here goes.

• Life feels stuck in general. Kind of like a punchered wheel, which moves but with a lot of discomfort and an always looming worry of it getting burst at any time.

• Delhi CM Kejriwal ji has been a fair administrator. But a huge disappointment for me as a politician. He and his party stood for something, which made them different from others. But now they are worse than in others in some ways. So, no longer interested in defending him for his antics. And the more he is busy making grand announcements and starting schemes just weeks before Delhi elections, the more I wonder how much more he could have done for Delhi in 5 years. 

• Indian PM Modi ji isn't all black and white like we want to project him. His politics lies somewhere in grey (dark or light grey is what we should debate on). I personally have a lot of complaints from him and think that he is more words than deeds. And frankly, I am tired of having to listen about him every waking day (good or bad). It's like we are being overdosed on Modi. It's bound to have some side effects. However, all said and done, you have to salute his energy as an almost 70 years guy. Some people at this age can't clean their own shit, he is day in and day out busy cleaning shit of the whole country. 

• Delhi's pollution is becoming toxic day by day. I really worry, someone known to me might get cancer having to breath this slow poison over the years.

• We are creatures of habit and it's really really difficult to get over your habits. If you can win over yourself, you can win over anybody. 

• Writing only seems sexy when you don't write. Otherwise, like all other worthwhile pursuits, it's hard toil to write something worth reading. 

• As I am growing older, maintaining relationships and friendships feels more as a chore than something to enjoy. 

• I realize that we are sucker for crass. I don't know how people watch shows like Big Boss or have a guts to watch News Debates daily (these shows must obviously be having high TRPs to continue to run long and strong). 

• As I have entered 30s, I have started to feel the wear and tear in the body and little niggles here and there. A Gentle reminder to not take this body for granted and take care of it. 

• There is just so much propaganda propagated nowadays, it's difficult to determine what's wrong and what's right. I wish we educate ourselves more before forming opinions about anything. 

• Who are these people who create jokes and memes on social media day in and day out ? What do they get in return? 

• I hate my phone. I want to go back to the days where I didn't used to carry a mobile in my pocket. Those were so much calmer. 

• Pleasure is addictive.  I (and mostly the ones I know of) have metaphorically become a dog chasing everything shiny and glittery, trying to get my own hits of dopamine. But leading a life based on comfort, entertainment and pleasure is a sure shot way to depression. Trying to reboot this blog is one such attempt to come out of this consumer mentality.

• I have probably hit rock bottom, when it comes to focus and grit. Not really a good place to be.  When I start something, now I am almost sure that I won't take it closure. But fight I must and fight I will. That's what being alive means.