March 29, 2012

Gootle: Defined.

A Very Brief History
The exact origins of the word/phrase "Gootle" is unknown. But Gootle became popular in Southern Deccan region sometime at the fag end of 2011. It is still a highly localized word but due to the power of social networking and enthusiastic users of the phrase, it is catching on with the masses.

Gootle: Defined
A Gootle (Hindi: गूटले) refers to a highly specialized person who *must* have all the following characteristics:
  1. First and foremost, he must be proud to be a Gootle.
  2. He must respect all the fellow Gootles.
  3. All Gootles are the same, irrespective of the caste, creed, color, language, height, weight, biceps, triceps, abs etc. Hence, a Gootle must refer to his fellow Gootle as a "Gootle" only and nothing else (no first names allowed).
  4. A Gootle must protect his peer Gootles from others, especially the non-gootles.
  5. A Gootle must automatically and magically develop all the other characteristics required, as and when the stated definition of Gootle changes.
As can be gauged from the above rules, "Gootle" is basically a masculine word. But it doesn't mean that only males can become a Gootle. While there hasn't yet been a single instance of a female identifying herself as a Gootle, but gauging by the rapid popularity of the term, it's estimated that this gender barrier will be broken soon. It has been agreed in the Gootle community to call a "female Gootle" as "Gootlee" (Hindi: गूटली) and be given the same rights as a male Gootle.

Everything (else) you wanted to know about Gootle
While it may seem that to be called a Gootle, a person has to be a born Gootle, it's not exactly true. A person can develop traits of a Gootle with constant practice, hard work and descipline. And once you start getting identified as a Gootle, it also doesn't gaurantee that you will remain a Gootle your whole life. You have to keep the same level of dedication and have to keep earning the right to be called a Gootle.

It should also be noted that while everyone can become a Gootle, not just "anyone" can become a Gootle. Some people who present themselves proudly as Gootles are in fact not at all a Gootle, because a true Gootle never brags himself. And some people spend their entire life without coming to know that they were in fact Gootles, and hence were way more awesome than they thought themselves to be.

Myth Busted!
There is a popular misconception among people (especially among ignorant souls and those non-gootles who are jealous of real Gootles) that "Gootle" is a derogatory term. But a true Gootle will testify that being called a Gootle especially by fellow Gootles is one of the proudest things that could have ever happened to him. In fact, even "Google" thinks that it's a "Gootle"!

How to become a Gootle?
So, if you also want to become a Gootle, all you have to do is to make use of the power of positive imagination. Imagine yourself to be Gootle all the time, behave like one, study other Gootles, emulate their styles, take tips from them and within no time you will become a Gootle yourself. Goot leck!

3 of the original Gootles

March 10, 2012

The Death of a Class

Rahul dravid Candid Dressing room 
And so the man retired. It hasn't hit me fully yet, may be it will take time to realize that now, I will never be able to see one of my most cherished cricketing heroes on the field.

I don't quite remember how he made his debut for India. But in my initial years of watching cricket, I wasn't quite fond of him. His slow defensive style of batting was never exciting to see after the dismissal of the great Sachin in 1990s. But as the years went by and he improved his technique and I as a cricket fan learned that Cricket was more than just hitting 4s and 6s and what kind of joy watching a Test match can bring, I began to admire Dravid more and more.

Test cricket has always been his forte, but the way he improvised in One Day cricket (and recently in T20) was just phenomenal. It will remain a big lesson for cricketers that you don't need to be "God of Cricket", all you need is rock solid determination to excel, to earn people's respect.

There are a number of things that I loved in Rahul's batting. His rock solid defensive strokes were breath taking (a puritan will understand), his leaving the swinging and rising balls was a treat to watch, he was as good a hooker and puller of ball as anybody in Indian team, and his classic off-drives were the ones to pay for. But the most important thing in his batting for me was his flawless batting technique and elegance which can be matched by only a few in the world. What he brought to the batting crease was a sense of calm and a belief that at least one end of the batting was secured. And that sense, that belief, I never got even while Sachin was batting.

The tonnes of patience that he had, I believe if I could work with that much patience in my own field, I would be able to achieve virtually anything. He has always been a team man and the one who seldom showed his emotions. 

Dravid's records are incredible and something that any budding cricket would aspire for. But as Dravid himself once said, that if you are a decent enough cricketer you are bound to achieve all that if you play long enough. What makes great cricketers great is not the records they make, but how they play the game. Rahul sledging anyone is out of equation, but such was the respect for him in opposing teams and fans that I seldom saw Rahul getting sledged by anyone. I have stated that I don't have a role model as such, and I may never have one. But for me, he will always be someone to look up to.

When you play under the shadow of someone like Sachin, you are bound to remain under-appreciated. I always felt that his achievements were not as much celebrated as they deserved to be.

Interestingly though, he is a favorite of many a 'girl fans', which is surprising, since you would think that they will fall for some one like Yuvraj or MSD. I guess it shows women look more for stability in life rather than excitement.

He is called "The Wall" of Indian Cricket and I would say, aptly so. And that is why it was heart burning to see him, of all cricketers, getting bowled again and again and again Down Under. Dravid has said that he was going to review his future after the series anyway, so I wish like all other fans, that he could have had his last Hurrah at one of the best places to play cricket.

Pics taken from Flickr Under CC license.

This is not the way he deserved to leave Cricket. But I am glad he left Cricket on his own terms. Good Bye Jammy, without you Cricket will never be the same for me. 

March 04, 2012

Untitled: Part 5

By the time I took out mobile from the pocket, I was notified 5 missed calls. It was Parag, the chatterbox of our group. So annoying, that I couldn't stand to stand beside him for 5 minutes but couldn't imagine my life without him either. As I mulled over whether to call him back and what to tell him as an excuse for being late, I received a message from him. "Wht the hell dude! why u nt picking up nd whr r u? did u take da wrng bus?".

Wrong bus!! Wow! How should I tell him that at the moment this is was the most right bus for me to be in! But hey, wrong bus idea was all his! I quickly typed, "Oh, sorry mate :( Couldn't pick up, am stuck in the middle of an overcrowded bus and it seems I actually have taken the 'wrong bus' ;( And there is even no space to get out from this 'hell'. Moreover, I started a little late. So, expect me to be 2-3 hours late..."

A few seconds later, "shit! Kk... reach soon. v r waiting.". How stupid of you Parag! I guffawed in my head. And at the same time, felt a little angry for getting such a short reply for such a long message. But, then he couldn't be blamed. At least he replied, I don't even get replies for over 80% of my messages. And after all, SMS does mean "Short" Messaging Services, not emails.

I was also feeling guilty for keeping my friends waiting yet another time. We had planned to watch the latest Hollywood flick, go check out a number of famous places here and have a good time the whole day. Now I wasn't sure if we would be able to do any of that. But the guilt went kaput the moment I saw her again.

The bus was a quite noisy, with all the people talking to each other. I didn't understand a single word of their Telugu. It's frustrating sometimes when friends do that and I don't get anything. But right now it was like a blessing. Because at the moment, all the Telugu chatter around wasn't distracting in anyway at all, in fact was acting as a perfect background score for my personal movie!
My eyes were still glazed on her. I wondered what her name would be. Asking her was not an option, but from the past experiences of hearing the names of a lot of girls here, I could bet that her name ended with an 'A'! 

"Why not call her 'Shraddha'? 
- Oh, not again, can't you think of any good names. You recently named your notebook as 'Shraddha'.
- Arrey yaar, but can't 2 people/things share the same name?
- Bro, 'Shraddha' is so North Indian! You gotta come out with something better.
- But, she definitely seems like 'Devotion' to me!
- Devotion my ass. By that logic you should start calling all the beautiful girls you see from morning to evening as 'Shraddha'. Probably give them versions like your softwares. Shraddha v 1.1, Shraddha Alpha, Shraddha 4 RC. And yeah, why not call Angelina as Shraddhangelina?  

My brain was not the best place to be in, at this moment. As the left and right part of my brain struggled to self-name my muse, suddenly a hard brake from the driver jolted the thoughts out of my mind, and my body from my position. What the heck happened there?

Job well done...

"Angel" by Peasap. Taken under CC license

As I opened my eyes,
the head still pounding,
consciousness coming and going,
the mouth tasting like vomit,
the veins trying to bust into pieces,
breath playing hard to catch up,
hands paralyzed, legs feeling crippled.

As I lay there in pool of own blood and sweat,
clothes torn, soiled, hair ruffled,
I saw the faces of my fam and friends,
the pride in their eyes, the smile on their faces.
At that moment, at that very moment,
the only noise that was impeding between the ears,
was of my own conscience.
It was shouting, voice mixed with relief and excitement,
"Job well done, Job well done, Job well done"...