January 29, 2014

On Following A Porn Star

Ahh... The post about porn. The post about a porn star. Well if you are one of the conservatives, you can probably skip this. If you are a hypocrite, you can read it and pretend that you skipped it. If you are reading it just to "haww" me, I welcome you. Let's schedule a meeting to discuss porn and "haww" someday. In any case, let's begin...

It started about an year ago. Have you heard about one Sunny Leone? (Oh please don't be disappointed so early!) Like most people I learned about her when she got featured in the Hindi Movie "Jism  2". A lady porn star, that too of Indian origins featuring in a mainstream Hindi movie. It had exciting prospects. Plus the fact that many people told she didn't live up to the "expectations"; I had to, had to watch it to find out. So one fine Sunday in the summer of 2013, I watched. It turned out to be a disaster of a movie. It was expected. But Leone got me hooked!  I am ready to debate she is one of the prettiest actresses in Hindi Film Industry right now. Well... of course, only if you can consider her an actress. Every time she tried doing her "acting thing" in the movie, I was laughing my guts out!

But anyway, Leone was not the point. The point was the porn star and what's it like being one. Pornstars weren't a topic of curiosity for me. But now, I wanted to know more about them. And Leone wasn't going to be my choice. So, I asked my friends to recommend a pretty porn star, "pretty" being the keyword. The good friends that they are, they generously sent a list of their favorites. Now nobody learns about anyone while they are "at work". So, I also researched a little from the list, found someone my age, checked out a few of them who were active on Twitter and lo' and behold : Tori Black.


Now, let's all agree on one fact : she IS beautiful. I mean she isn't the most beautiful female I have ever seen, but she is great! So great, I even started following her on Instagram. But then I stopped checking Instagram. I wanted to subscribe to her site too. But that was mostly - unfortunately but understandably and obviously - NSFW stuffs. And paid too. So, I didn't (couldn't). 

But she did write a few blog posts. I love people who maintain a blog. She was a porn star. And she had a blog. So I read some of that. It was disappointing mostly. She writes normal stuffs, everyday boring general life with mention of her sex life here and there. 

Though as I started following her, I learned about one interesting thing immediately. She was married, and was actually going to become a mommy! She wrote about being mommy. It was cute, but boring again. 

But then I thought, wow! Here's a lady just 1 month older than me. She is famous (try googling her name). She does her own business. She is married with someone she loves. And she is already a mom. Now, I would not want to become a pornstar to trade all that. But still a big shame on me. 

About her twitter feed... She is a regular on twitter, which is a delight. Talks revolve around mostly porn, but she likes to talk about other stuffs too. She would often post selfies like normal boring people. Difference being they would mostly be in bare minimum, or bare none. But she is aesthetic about it most of the times, which is just great.


Also great to see that most people communicate with respect. Compare that with Youtube comments on any "Hot Bollywood Song". No really compare it. Watch a "Hot Bollywood Song" right now.

Here's a list of some of the things I learned about the life of a porn star (by now you would know how much I like lists). It's not boring, but it's not too amazing either. 
  • If you take out the porn, they are normal boring people. Probably with heightened sexual appetite.
  • They are businessman. Just like anyone else. They interact, they engage. And then they sell their product (new paid content).
  • At least the ones at the top, are happy to do it. There's no compulsion.
  • They are not jealous of each other (at least that's what I could perceive). They would generously talk about their peers (read competitors). 
  • They are confident human beings. I mean we all are ashamed to be seen naked. I am. But they have already shown themselves inside out. No embarrassment now. 
  • They are not prostitutes. There's a subtle difference between the two.
  • They are professional. Being a famous pornstar requires HARD WORK. Not everyone can become a pornstar, even if they want to. So they will tear you down if you are disrespectful. 


"Porn is something that cannot be made too public. Ours is a conservative society. It's our duty to stop the children from being exposed to it." I understand all that. My problem is with our double standard on the topic of sex, porn and prostitution. None of us want to talk about it. But then everyone gets engaged with it at some point or another. 

We won't legalize prostitution. Some people suggested banning porn sites completely in India sometime ago. If you get involved in premarital sex you become a stigma on the family's honor. But it's normal to get child-married and have kids early in life. It's fine, if you have a lot more children than you can handle. It's round about OK if there's rape inside family itself.

I won't recommend anyone to become a porn star. But it's so much better than a perfectly normal human being begging on the roads, and involving their little children too. I am also not trying to glorify porn here. I am not trying to push you to become interested in pornstars all of a sudden (I recommend Tori Black if you do). I followed a porn star, solely because I was curious (and of course, she is beautiful). So, I will continue to follow her, despite everything.



A few days ago, I wrote about Why I want a Gay friend. Would I also like a pornstar friend? Umm.. Let's answer it this way:
Would I want to befriend a porn star (with no friends-with-benefit clause)? Sure!
But some of my (male AND female) friends sometimes joke about becoming a porn star one day. That gives me nightmares.


[All pictures taken from Tori's twitter feed. I claim no copyright.]