Showing posts with label Ravi. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Ravi. Show all posts

July 19, 2012

Ravi Ji: Conditions Apply

I have been noticing that the phrase "Ravi Ji" is being abused and misused all over India. I greatly object to this utter non-adherence to the rules. People don't realize that "Ravi Ji" is a copyrighted phrase (the copyright has been lost somewhere but it will be found soon). Hence only selected few people are allowed to use this phrase:
  •  People belonging to political and administrative circles: These are the ones who get the most  "Jis". It will really be heartwarming to hear a "Ravi Ji" from one of these!
  • (Native) People of Hyderabad: The phrase was coined in the city, after a lot of debate and struggle hence the native people there were granted exclusive rights to use the phrase by amending the constitution. It's a shame most of those residents don't know of their right.
  • Namrata R: The joint copyright holder of the phrase.
  • Friends older than 7 years (not the age of person stupid, the age of friendship): 7 being a random number that first popped in mind.
  • Fellow Gootles: I told you, being a gootle comes with its own perks!
  • People who have taken money from me: They better call me "Ravi Ji". More importantly they must give me back my money. I have begged for it enough number of times.
  • Family, and friends who are part of extended family: These people already know they can call me whatever the heck they want.
  • Underweight People: I want to become the leader of such guys. We people may be underdogs but we are never underachievers. Mind it!
  • If you belong to an upper caste and are fair in color: Heck yeah, I love casteism and racism!


Well if you don't belong to any of above mentioned categories but still want to use the phrase, you still have hope! Fill and submit the below mentioned form. If deemed fit, right to use the phrase would be granted for a limited period.



If you don't want to fill this (rather short) form, then you can also write to me on my personal email id requesting for the access.


Please do note that use of phrase without having a licence permission is a criminal offence and it may land you in the middle of many litigation. It's advisable to be mindful of this fact.

July 28, 2011

Battle Royale : RavS vs Ravi

To you *RavS* and *Ravi* might be one and the same, or the names might even not matter. But for me, RavS and Ravi seem to be 2 completely different personalities. It's like I have dual nature and I don't know which one is correct or better than the other. So, to get a clearer view, I asked myself the question... 

Differentiate b/w Ravi and RavS

  • Ravi is a reality, and practicality.
    • RavS is a concept. An ideology.
  • Ravi is God made (through parents :)
    • RavS is self made (with some help from friends)
  • Ravi believes in hard work and dedication.
    • RavS is lazy but believes in smart work and shrewdness.
  • Ravi is a Hindi word that means 'Sun'
    • RavS can have different meanings in different contexts. But basically RavS is an amalgam of words Ravi + Singh.
  • Ravi's full name is Ravi Singh
    • RavS uses RavS RSH for full name (RSH being used as a trademark nickname and in Alt names like @twitRSH).
  • Ravi is shy by nature and needs to be pushed get work done.
    • RavS is ready to take initiative and can push others when the need arises.
  • Ravi likes to play safe.
    • RavS is far more adventurous and is ready to take risks if the stakes are high.
  • Ravi is not very talkative and keeps the conversation to the point.
    • RavS is fun to be with, so people like his company.
  • Ravi is confident in his abilities and works within his limitations.
    • RavS feels insecure and is always looking to improve.
  • Ravi is inclusive, officially and unofficially, so he is answerable to every deed.
    • RavS is exclusive, and underground.
  • Ravi is omnipresent, off and on line.
    • RavS is mostly an Internet alter ego.
  • Ravi is simple, fair and humble.
    • RavS plays with attitude and believes in "ends being more important than means".
  • Ravi does not want a girl friend.
    • RavS does not have a girl friend.
  • Ravi has matured and is ready to take responsibilities (umm.. I guess :).
    • RavS is still not fully defined and is evolving day by day.

January 16, 2011

Ravi... 2001

Note: The stuff inside parentheses are the comments of the present day RavS.

Hi, my name is Ravi ( RavS: This guy has no idea he is gonna become legendary RavS! ). I study in Shiv Vani School, an alright school ( No. The school bloody sux ). I am in 8th standard, I mean, I passed 7th at the start of the year and now I have been promoted to 8th! I came first for the first time in my life, and it feels good ( suck it, all it brings is more pressure to perform. All you want is more than average marks and that's it ). I mean it's been my long cherished dream to get to the first position and it came after a long journey from 28->23->13->8->6->3->2->1 ( for what I can remember ) and even getting to there wasn't short of miracle. But let's leave it. I have so much more to tell you about myself.

OK, let me tell you about my favorite subjects. Maths and Science! ( somethings in life never change ). Well, English, SStd and Sanskrit are also OK. I hate Hindi, but I think the Hindi hates me more. I always get Hindi teachers who ridicule me and this year's madam ( without writing her name ) just slapped me, all because I filled the index before doing the work. Even the paper comes too long. It tiring to write those 'nibandhs' and 'jeewani' stuff. To save time, I don't draw lines over the Hindi word. And well as expected, have been scolded for that too. Talking about Hindi, I have recently been hearing about this guy called Vikas ( who later evolves to become VK ) who is just awesome with his Hindi poems. I have heard a few and he is just amazing. How can he write such stuffs at this age? Does he copy?

I don't like this SUPW period either. I had to take French during 6th because my best friend wanted to and he said it will be helpful if I ever wanted to go abroad or something. He also said there is this guy named Katyayan who has got 99.99% in 5th and he is also taking French ( No seriously Katy! ). But in 7th it became a pain in the . So, this time I made sure I don't get French any way.

Hey, did I tell you our class has got this whole new bug of pen fight? I mean we people are literally doing nothing but fighting pens during period change. And we have started to take it to the limits with filling up nails and other heavy metal stuffs inside our pens. Many a times, teachers have caught us with our acts and took our pens but we people are always back in business. I personally am not that great but play it anyway. Well, there is this guy named Yogender ( future YogS ) who is pretty good at the game but he usually plays with his bench-mate and not talk to us that much. And well it's kind of weird since he lives quite close to my home but we don't know each other that well ( wait till he becomes your bench mate next year, and start sucking into your life :) ).

And, well this year we have got a new guy in the class. His name is Prakash and I think he is the most respectable person I have ever met ( oh SUI!! ). He comes as a gentleman and talks with everybody so nicely. .

OK, enough of school talk. Because school is routine. Reach school, forcibly pray, study, play, wait for period to get over, pray Hindi period goes fine, return home, eat lunch ( 2 chapattis in school don't count ) then back to tuition. Come back home by 6 and now I am the king. I really love to watch Alladin and Duck Tales. I am also a sucker for newspaper ( told ya! ) but only the sport section and also like comics ( told ya that too! ). But bhains ki aankh, I don't get to read it that much. I have to get it on rent or read when bua brings them.

And I am a big cricket fan. That's the only sport I watch. Earlier this year, I was enthralled when Harbhajan made the mockery of Aussies and took 33 wickets in the series and Laxman played that legendary innings of 281 along with my favorite Rahul who got 180 something. I watched the whole series and it was just fascinating. But this new guy Matthew Hayden was just too much. He made 1000+ runs in test and one day series. Well I also came to know about the death of sir Don Bradman. I don't know who he really was but his average of 99.94 was just fascinating and he also said that Tendulkar plays like him. Wish he could have completed his century at least, in age.

This year, a big tragedy happened. The World Trade Center, about which I had never heard before came crashing down because of this terrorist attack by some Osama something. I only came to know about it the next day, because I was celebrating my B'Day on T'Day. Anyways, friends were saying it was huge and two huge buildings came crashing down when a plane hit them. So after school I ran back home and watched it on TV, from all the angles possible. OK, did I tell you we bought a new color TV a few months ago. I asked my dad to buy this LG one because it had this cricket game in it but now the game seems boring. I can hit almost every ball for a six.

Now wish if I could have a computer also . Some of my friends have already got it. When will I get it?( You will get it buddy, just be patient ) I just want to play Mario and Pacman and Dave on it the whole day like my friends. Yeah, I have this cassette game player which you can connect to TV and play all day. But it will be so much fun to play it on computer. You can also work on MS Word and Powerpoint and Notepad ( Yeah, I will see how much you work on notepad ) and play music and stuff.

Sometimes, I wonder what I will become in future ( Say computer engineer )? I mean, if you would have asked me this when I was a kid, I would have given you different answers, like Doctor, Pilot, Police man ( Engineer? ). 2 years back, I was sure I was gonna become a scientist ( Damn it, say Engineer ). But don't know now. May be join Army ( ? ) or a Civil Services ( ?? ).. or an Engineer ( yeah ;) ). I have read about these IITs and IIMs and all. But I really can't tell right now.

10 years from now? I don't know. I would like to have a computer for sure! And would love if all my friends could go to the same college as me ( :( ). And to Ravi of that time.. Sabki Bhains ki Aankh Nikal diyo!! ( Thanks mate! )