January 16, 2012

My list of Things/People to kill before I die... this Doomsday

Disclaimer: I am NOT actually going to kill any of them. So if they die tomorrow, I should not be held responsible.

  • Saas Bahu soaps: Seriously, if I kill them, then that would be the happiest day of my life (nevermind the last). They have given me hundreds of sleepless nights, extreme anxiety, taken my anger to new levels and made me want to crash & burn the stupid TV so many times. It's time you die, you whiny bitches X(

  • Indian Cricket Team: With whatever that is happening Down Under, I wish the dooms day comes today only, the whole Indian Cricket Team dies and we get to see a brand new Indian Cricket Team... with the same players of course, just with 6 pack abs! I am convinced, missing 6-packs are the reason why Indian team is not performing.

  •  Rafael Nadal: ... also Novak Djokovic and Andy Murray. I am sure that way at least one of my 12 wishes for 2012 will come true :)

  • XP: He, I mean; it has become so old and path3tic, I just fail to understand why he.. err.. it is still liked by people. I have already said him- no- it good bye a long time ago. It's time the world says so as well. And I hope he it gets a painful end!

Taken from Flickr under CC license.
Picture representative of what
 I face sometimes :/

  • Stray dogs in my neighbourhood: I just fail to understand where do they keep coming from? It's like every time I go out for a walk, I find a new dog sitting around saying "Hey bro, What up!". And yesterday's black one was like "Your derriere is written all over my teeth, cutie!".

  • Anti-corruption crusaders: Life was so easy in the pre-2011 era. It was so much fun to pay some extra cash and the work used to get done in no time. But ever since, these people came, they have almost taken away the fun. And their propaganda of "Hum Bharat se Bhrashtaachar ka vinaash kar denge". Abe, poore Bharat ka vinaash nahin ho jaayega?

  • Rakhi Sawant: Actually, I wanted to write Dolly Bindra, but I am too scared of her.

  • The guy who made Mayan calendar: Dude you were awesome you predicted when the world is going to die, before you died yourself. But what the shit is this?

  • Justin Baby: I know it will kill lakhs of teenage girls as well, but then they are stupid enough anyway, to like him. Plus, they are not age suitable for my girl friend dream, anymore, so I don't care!

  • FB: So, that I can Actually talk to my friends in my last time, instead of writing a stupid FB status: "Friends, this is my last post on FB. Please don't like it."

  • People who give admissions in nursery schools: Those who think that getting admissions into Engineering/Medical colleges is difficult, should try taking admission into a good Nursery school.

  • Supporters of "Honour" killings: But they should get killed with full honours, of course.
That guy could so have been me :-/

  • Bloody Pitt: Me and Angelina were so meant for each other, if only he hadn't come in between X( I had even thought of our nick name: "Ravangelina"! Although "Jolie Singh" wasn't bad either!

  • Those who don't believe they will die this Dooms day: That way I would be able to say, "Told ya!".