December 25, 2011

10 commandments of a true ABAPer

1. Thou shall write the actual code for 1 hour and spend next 5 hours on commenting and aligning the code.

2. Thou shall blame thy every confusing code snippet to the "best practice".

3. Thou shall be confused all the time and don't forget to confuse thine friends all the time.

4. Thou shall copy thine friend's code shamelessly. If it's their, it's thine!

5. Thou shall ask too many people the same problem, get conflicting answers and then wonder who out of them is correct!

6. Thou shall blame thy every failure on everything: the instructor, the mentor, the evaluator, the peer, the problem, the server, the ABAP, the SAP, the luck... everything except thee!

7. Thou shall regularly take breaks from writing code to play bubble shooter or vice versa.

8. Thou shall consider getting short dumps as a matter of pride. "What! You got just 3 short dumps? I got 7 today!"

9. Thou shall screw all performance considerations while writing code and then screw the code to maximise performance.

10. Thou shall spew verbal obscenities in thine local language on the creators of SAP for making thy life a living hell...